21 Spiritual Retreat Questions

Happy New Year!

Happy Solemnity of Mary, Mother of God!

I had a beautifully different New Years this year. Instead of parties with friends, fun drinks, and a TV turned to (the rerun of) the ball dropping in Times Square, I spent the night at a Marian Shrine with a friend. We went to Adoration at 11PM, then participated in mass at midnight. The rest of the day we engaged in prayer and conversation.

Like I said - beautiful. We each wanted to spend some time away for different reasons. Although it wasn't my intention, I'm beginning the new year with a plenary indulgence! How's that for starting out on the right foot?!

In our conversations, my friend and I made a list of retreat-type questions that we thought would fuel good thought and prayer. After completing the list and reflecting on it, we both picked out the question that was hardest for us to answer and focused on that area throughout our "mini-retreat". I feel it was spiritually fruitful for both of us!

Without further ado...here's the list of 21 questions! Use them for your own mini-retreat, even if that just means hiding in a quiet space in your home for a few minutes.

1. What was the highlight of 2013? What word will define your 2014?
2. What would God view as your biggest accomplishment?
3. What's the key area you want to improve in your life? What proactive steps can you take towards it?
4. What are you grateful for?
5. Who are you grateful for? Have you told them?
6. What topic are you avoiding talking about with God?
7. Who has influenced you in your faith? Who are you influencing?
8. Who is your role model in faith? How can you be more like him/her?
9. When is it easy to trust God? When is it more difficult?
10. How does God want you to improve your prayer life?
11. How do you maintain active participation in mass?
12. What's your biggest hurdle to loving God? How can you start to overcome it?
13. Would others say your actions are an extension of God's love?
14. Do you turn to prayer in times of desolation AND consolation?
15. How can you grow closer to God this year? (ie. focus on increasing your faith, hope, or love?)
16. Loving and serving God comes only after knowing Him. How can you deepen your understanding of God?
17. Who can you purposefully be Christ for? How?
18. What visible reminders do you have of your faith?
19. "He is always with you, be always with Him." How?
20. How do you show mercy?
21. What are your top three priorities? Do you spend your time accordingly?

St. Thérèse of Lisieux (who is making her way into my life), pray for us!

The Gift of Tears

I've found myself crying, or near tears, a lot more often recently. But these aren't normal tears - they aren't tears of self-pity or sadness or joy for something happening in my life. They have to do with the transformation going on inside of me. These days, I can't even get through mass without tearing up.

Friday evening, driving home from work, I was reflecting on Jesus' passion. All of a sudden, I was sobbing, moved by how much He must have loved us, even in the midst of our darkest hour - condemning and killing our Savior. It's something I've thought about before, but that night, it hit me hard. I wanted to make it up to Him, but my whole life's work is not even enough. I was reminded of Mother Teresa's vow to refuse nothing to Christ. Really, isn't that the only acceptable response?

This isn't the first time I've been overcome to the point of tears...

I distinctly remember a moment from my confirmation retreat in 8th grade. We were spread out throughout the dimly-lit cathedral, praying individually. The retreat leaders came around to each of us, asked what we'd like to pray for, and then joined us in prayer for a few minutes. When my turn came, I burst into tears. I was overwhelmed by two things:

1. As we entered the cathedral for this quiet prayer time, we were handed a small sheet of paper with a letter typed out - something like this (I wish I could find the actual one!). The "letter" was written from Jesus, explaining how much He loves us individually and wants to be with us, even though He reaches out to us a million times and we don't respond.
2. This stranger wanted to pray for MY intentions. She had never met me before, but she took the time to ask, "What can I pray for?", and then sat with me and prayed for me, for my family, and I don't know what else. To tell the truth, I was so overcome that I couldn't think of anything specific to ask her to pray about!

This was my first real encounter with both Jesus' unique love for me, as described in the letter, and another's openness to pray with and for me. By offering to pray for me, she showed me what Christ's love looks like. It was beautiful! ...and more than I could handle.

Two more teary-eyed moments were during retreats in college (the Awakening retreat I talked about in my post on Aggie Catholics). My freshman year, I was overcome by the sacrifice of the students running the retreat - giving up their weekend to be there for us and welcoming us where we were, with open arms. After the initial excitement of the retreat, we had time for confession and quiet reflection. The only light in the room came from the candles we set in the shape of a cross. I once again saw Jesus' love poured out through others.

The other time, I was a sophomore, giving a talk during the retreat. The support I got from the other students, in hand-written notes, small gifts, and a group prayer over me before I spoke really did me in. They showered me with thoughts and prayers, again revealing the depths of Jesus' love. (I'll post my talk some other time!)

These moments were some of the most poignant of my faith journey. They occurred when I was being transformed, renewing my dedication to know, love, and serve God. I've always had a relationship with God the Father, but I tend to keep Jesus at a distance. I can't fathom how much He endured, and sometimes I don't feel like our salvation was worth it.

But in these moments that bring me to tears, I can't escape His love. He chose to die for us, freely. That's a gift I'm trying to accept. As much as I don't like crying, I'm drawn to these encounters, both feeling Christ's love through others and being Christ to others. I can't back away, because I'd really be missing out. My tears mean I'm growing in love.

So...hi Jesus, and thank You!

St. John Lateran - Rome, Italy

Aggie Catholics...there's something in the water

I am amazed by the Catholic community at Texas A&M and in the surrounding area. I've personally met a few of their members years ago, and although I was far away from my normal surroundings, I felt right at home due to their genuine love and earnest desire to lift up others. They were individuals, each striving to build a Christ-centered life and to share that joy with everyone they met. We became fast friends, and I was really sad to see them go when we said our good byes. I haven't kept in touch with them as I'd like, but every time I think about them and the weekend we shared, I smile and feel their joy once again.

In addition to my personal experience, two other things stand out to me that distinguish this group and solidify it in my mind as a vibrant, life-giving community.
 
Awakening

Awakening retreats have popped up at more than 40 college campuses across the country. The retreat is generally a weekend away from campus consisting of small group discussion and activities, talks by fellow students, lots of singing, silly costumes, confession, mass, and community-building to deepen participants' love of Christ. It is well-scheduled and well-designed, and each college adds a little of its own flavor.

I had the opportunity to serve as coordinator years ago. There were some stressful moments (as you'd expect when running a 2-night, 100-person event): regulating preparations, keeping speakers on schedule, and discerning successors, but overall it was such a rewarding and humbling experience. Strong, lasting friendships were formed, many tears were shed, and the community dedicated themselves to Christ in a profound way.

My first time on the retreat, I was moved by the outpouring of love by the staffers, even before I had any concept of the hard work and prayers they had contributed to make the weekend happen. After staffing in many different capacities over the subsequent years, I came to understand and appreciate even more what an extraordinary retreat it is. One day I'll post my prayer talk, which I still find relevant to my life today.

The retreat is decentralized, so it only spreads as students talk about their experiences and other colleges reach out to current participants for help setting up their own retreat. Without Texas A&M, this retreat would not have spread across the country like it has. McNeese University started the retreat in 1974, and Texas A&M got a hold of it in 1983. The Aggies have the largest and longest-running Awakening retreat in the country, and they have helped many other colleges set up their own, which is how I met these lovely people!

They drove 700 miles, missing Friday classes and lots of sleep, just to help another college get their retreat off the ground. They were eager to help and didn't complain at all the entire weekend. I don't know how many other colleges they directly contributed to, but their influence is widely felt (whoop!).



40 Days for Life

The campaign against abortion has never been stronger. 40 Days for Life is a prayerful protest of abortion clinics across the US and spreading into other countries. It started in Bryan, TX (where else!) by the Coalition for Life in 2004 to protest the Planned Parenthood clinic down the street. Its first year going national, more than 80 cities joined. Today, there are more than 500 cities (including 19 other countries) contributing to the effort. That's amazing. (Looking back through pictures of my time with my Aggie family in 2007, I noticed that one of them was wearing a 40 Days for Life shirt. More than 5 years later, I am now discovering what a great cause they had already begun!)

I just finishing the book Unplanned, which told me about the role this Texas community has played in the pro-life movement. I'm looking forward to participating in my local 40 Days for Life campaign in the fall. As a result of the community here, a surgery center that approved second trimester abortions in 2009 had many patients cancel there appointments, and the center never performed a single procedure. They abandoned their plans to offer abortions after peaceful protests and questions into the legality of the procedure. What a victory!




These two programs have done great things for the Bryan/College Station community, the US Catholic community, and the world at large. This is a loving group that is making a big impact in such an inspiring way. In the manner of Switch, we need to examine this "bright spot". What makes this Texas community so successful at cultivating a loving environment and launching wide-reaching programs? How can we foster those same qualities in other communities to make their efforts as impactful as they can be? There must be something in the water.

For now, I stand in awe.