(Taken from prayer journal, written 8/17/12 during Adoration)
Oh Jesus, friend of sinners,
Break our hearts for what breaks Yours
We constantly strive to know and do Your will - we fail, but we keep trying.
There are so many sins in this world, and they should appall us and throw us into more fervent prayer.
We love all creatures, but we can't tolerate the failings of ourselves or others - we must make amends and ask for forgiveness.
We must speak out for what we believe and not hide from the pointing fingers and ridicule of society, for we know the Truth, and we know the Truth will lead us to You.
You have given us everything - sacrificing Your own life so that we may be saved from our failings in this world. Move use to challenge ourselves and those around us to accept You and receive the love You are constantly showering upon us.
Help us as we lift each other up to You. Our missions are all different but are directed towards the same goal - to serve You and show Your love to all those around us.
You've given us such an example in Mary, who completely surrendered her will to Yours and underwent so much suffering, yet she never turned away from You. We must direct our lives to the service of Your ends and not waver from the calls You have placed in our hearts.
Help us to still our minds enough to listen to You whispering to us. We find it increasingly difficult as the speed of our lives increases.
I had a beautifully different New Years this year. Instead of parties with friends, fun drinks, and a TV turned to (the rerun of) the ball dropping in Times Square, I spent the night at a Marian Shrine with a friend. We went to Adoration at 11PM, then participated in mass at midnight. The rest of the day we engaged in prayer and conversation.
Like I said - beautiful. We each wanted to spend some time away for different reasons. Although it wasn't my intention, I'm beginning the new year with a plenary indulgence! How's that for starting out on the right foot?!
In our conversations, my friend and I made a list of retreat-type questions that we thought would fuel good thought and prayer. After completing the list and reflecting on it, we both picked out the question that was hardest for us to answer and focused on that area throughout our "mini-retreat". I feel it was spiritually fruitful for both of us!
Without further ado...here's the list of 21 questions! Use them for your own mini-retreat, even if that just means hiding in a quiet space in your home for a few minutes.
What was the highlight of 2013? What word will define your 2014?
What would God view as your biggest accomplishment?
What's the key area you want to improve in your life? What proactive steps can you take towards it?
What are you grateful for?
Who are you grateful for? Have you told them?
What topic are you avoiding talking about with God?
Who has influenced you in your faith? Who are you influencing?
Who is your role model in faith? How can you be more like him/her?
When is it easy to trust God? When is it more difficult?
How does God want you to improve your prayer life?
How do you maintain active participation in mass?
What's your biggest hurdle to loving God? How can you start to overcome it?
Would others say your actions are an extension of God's love?
Do you turn to prayer in times of desolation AND consolation?
How can you grow closer to God this year? (ie. focus on increasing your faith, hope, or love?)
Loving and serving God comes only after knowing Him. How can you deepen your understanding of God?
Who can you purposefully be Christ for? How?
What visible reminders do you have of your faith?
"He is always with you, be always with Him." How?
How do you show mercy?
What are your top three priorities? Do you spend your time accordingly?
St. Thérèse of Lisieux (who is making her way into my life), pray for us!
Jesus, we desperately need you. Your world is destroying itself with anger and discord. Tragedies happen every day, and no one is moved to tears. Your people suffer; scandal and immorality surround us.
We need Your message of love - recognizing the dignity of all people and serving them, loving all. We need to be reminded of Your example, caring for the sick, reaching out to the broken, and showing others what it means to be neighbor to all.
Help us preserve life in all stages, in all countries. Give us Your Spirit to guide our words and actions, and open the hearts of all to hear and respond.
We unite our suffering to Yours; You are the supreme example of loving fully, without holding anything back. Give us the courage to follow Your lead, to listen to the yearnings of our hearts, and to ever strive to grow closer to You.
Mother Mary, join our prayer for unity and peace throughout the world.
Mary's whole reason for being (besides, you know, saying yes to God and birthing the savior) is to bring us closer to her son, so the fact that people around the world gather to encounter the physical presence of Jesus provides some fulfillment to her mission. We also know that, like the rest of the saints, Mary is present with us in the mass:
And so we join the angels and the saints in proclaiming your glory as we sing
(I love the Latin! ...and the fact that I have a fair understanding of a language I've never been taught. I can't imagine how much more I would know if I grew up attending mass completely in Latin as in pre-Vatican II!)
What makes Mary unique in the context of the Eucharist is that she was the original tabernacle. We make our receptacles out of precious metal today to show respect for the contents, following God's example: He chose Mary, a woman without sin, to be the perfect vessel that would carry so sacred a body.
In the mass and in the Eucharist, we become like Mary. We are forgiven our venial sins at the beginning of mass and present ourselves as-perfect-as-possible to receive Jesus, body and soul, into our own bodies. Our "amen" echos Mary's "yes" and her total surrender to God's will. If we approach to receive Communion without truly repenting of our sins or without upholding the tenants of the Church God has given us, we disrespect Christ by putting Him in a tainted vessel. No one (save Mary) is spotless, but it is through adherence to Truth and confession of wrong that we become worthy enough to enjoy a physical intimacy with Jesus. Mary carried Jesus inside her for nine months - what joy that must have been. The Eucharist is the closest we can get to her experience.
After receiving the Eucharist and returning to my pew to give thanks for this "communion" with Jesus (because that's what it's called!), I think of Mary. I imagine a veil over my head and bask in the same peace she carried throughout her life. Just for a moment, I feel a deep connection to Mary, as I've become like her - a vessel for Christ.
the calm.
